Sunday, August 31, 2014

It Really Is That Simple--K-& Everyone I Write This For(You Know Why)--Grief/Recovery/Mental Illness/Special Needs/LGBT--Hope&Survivors--What I need You To Know-Why I Really Write This Blog

I've been thinking about something for quite awhile now--Something that sometimes weighs on my mind--& sometimes lifts, & then comes back, with a suddenness that shocks me, having forgotten what it really felt like. It's been on my mind for a few days, working itself out in pieces--& along with other things, someone new put some things in perspective, just by sharing with me that--'unfortunately & fortunately, we aren't in this alone'.

I've discovered something over time--In my own life & the lives I've observed around me the last 4 decades. There is a Place, where ppl who suffer thru certain things in this life--Are allowed to grieve& celebrate--Separated by & away from, the good ppl, the normal average ones, the ones who did'nt 'bring this upon themselves', the ones who should try harder to fit in & comply. Where the average, so called normal ppl don't appreciate or understand, that even a tiny accomplishment can be a life changing, life affirming thing.

Where ppl who struggle with being different are shuffled off to, in a subliminal, almost unconscious way by the masses--So that the nice, appropriate behaving ppl, don't have to watch those who aren't as good as they are, be taken down by their own defects--Or celebrate small things that are too small, insignificant, for them to bother to care about.

And you know?? I'd been worn down by the pain inflicted... By the unintentional jabs & the passive-aggressive barbs of the holier-than-thou. By the ppl who know someone for years--Only to turn their backs, when it's inconvenient for them, to deal with your struggles.

It's all bull shit...Those things ppl tell you--That you're not as important--Not as capable--Not worthy of the sunshine hitting your face & the Heavens acknowledging your joys & your pain...Well, that's all bull shit. It always was...& man, I just didn't see it.

Pain is pain. Love is love. Fear. Joy. Longing. Affection, compassion, fascination. Companionship. Friendship. Respect. Love.

These things--These basic human rights--Are not as far off as they seem. These are not only for ppl who live perfect lives--According to whoever is supposedly in charge, in authority, the ones who supposedly know more than you. These other ppl are not the only ones entitled to be happy.

You must understand...This is a very particular kind of alienation, stigmatizing ppl who struggle with differences, willfully excluding them from the population of ppl that are supposed to be a persons support, center, identity--Only to be marginalized--Pushed aside to the Place that the not normal, not ok, not acceptable ppl must go.

And with them, you lose even more ppl to this culturally acceptable prejudice as you push these ppl aside--You push away-Unintentionally & not-The ppl who choose to stay with these ones who don't fit in...Who struggle to hold their head up, when the winds of the wishes of the ppl around them, blow stonger, hoping to push those heads down--So the masses don't have to face what they all fear....What they don't understand...What they don't have the courage to accept. Imperfection. Change. Uncertainty. Lose. Pain.

Yet, it's these marginized ppl around you-- That continue to hold their heads up high--Look you right in the face--& Say I will not go quietly...I will not be afraid....You will not make me ashamed.

These are my Heros. These are the ppl I know. The ppl that struggle & come out better for it. The ppl that touch lives--Sometimes only briefly--And make us better for it. These are the ppl I see.

I see you...And I'm proud of you...& I'm not going anywhere without you. The roads ahead will lead I don't know where...But the light at the end is never so far that we can't get there together.

It really is that simple.

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