Tuesday, August 1, 2017

To Me-AZ Rains Series

This night,
You find me
Here, 
Again.

The dust,
Rolls off my
Feet,
As I look
Around 
Me.

Your eyes,
They always
Find 
Me, 
Testament,
To 
Why I 
Stay 
Here.

The rain,
Always 
Is,
As it
Should 
Be,
A pulse
In my 
Chest.

That look,
The one
That
Brings me
Down 
Here,
From 
My balcony
Crawl.

Oh, but
Others,
Hmmm,
They wouldnt
See it 
This way,
Would they,
This 
Desperation
Seek.

But you,
You
See this
Place 
As I 
Do, 
The one
Place
In time,
I will
Always
Find
You. 

Where I
Was 
Always 
Meant 
To
Be,
Your
Testament
To
Me.


Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Anything But You--AZ Rains Series

His arms around 
Me,
In silence.
A sound 
Only 
Hear.

The echoes 
Below me,
I hear in 
My dreams.

A feather
Left on my
Door step,
A reminder
Of
You.

The howling
At my feet,
The call 
Of 
The
Wind.

I wait 
Outside
For 
You,
&
You lead me
There.

Puddles 
Escape my
Toes,
Rain 
Pours around 
Me.

The sounds
Of your
Voice,
In my ear,
Rings
In my
Head.

I don't breath
Without 
You,
You tell
Me.

I can't
Remember
Anything,
But
You.

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

To You--Angels, Guardians, & Soul Mates Series

The 
Crimson 
Tides,
Upon this
Shore.
You live
Here,
My 
Past.

Your 
Feet,
Upon my 
Sands.
Feel you
Here,
Walking thru
My 
Memories.

Distant 
Roar,
A hurricane 
Sounds.
Sirins blare,
A song
That brings
Me
From
My 
Myself.

Gladly
Stay,
Far from
Where  I
Should 
Be.
Off
The beaten
Path,
They say.
But 
All my
Roads,
Always lead
To
You.

Monday, May 1, 2017

My Angel--Angels, Guardians, & Soul Mates Series

Home,
Is where your 
Voice
Brings me.

The Gentle 
Vibrations,
Against my ribs,
They 
Rumble
Ache 
Still.
A feeling
I crave
To
Relive,
Again,
&
Again,
&
Again.

The Chocking
Sound,
In his 
Throat,
As he 
Walks away.
I remember
this
Still,
A passage
Of
Time.

The Air,
Across my
Chest,
A breeze
Remorseless,
Of
Everything
But 
Him.
A searing 
Relief.

Why Does
Your Spirit
Keep me
Here.
Where
I can only 
Think
Of you.

Like A Drug,
Your 
Taste 
On my 
Mouth,
Lingers.
A source 
Of survival
That 
Dies too
Fast.

The Center,
Of this place,
Comes 
To 
Me
In my
Dreams. 
The warmth,
Only
Inside
You,
Absent 
When 
You're
Gone.

Blanket Me
With 
It,
This night.
Wrap 
Around 
Me,
Your wings,
Gentle
&
Free.

Let 
The music
I hear 
In my mind,
Only 
You
Make me
Hear,
Lull 
Me 
To
Sleep,
Once
More.

For Tomorrow,
The world
Waits.
But,
With 
You 
In
My
Dreams,
Survive
Another
Day.
My 
Angel,
&
I.










Wednesday, April 12, 2017

The Story--AZ Rains--A "By Josephine McRose" Series

Once,
on the river front,
in the dark,
where I liked to be,
he came.

I waited for him 
there,
so,
I suppose 
you could say,
it
wasn't 
some great 
moment.
As if it was 
fate.

Ah,
but 
that's just 
what 
it was,
tho.
wasn't it.

His face 
above me.
His eyes looking 
at me,
that.......
breath  he would
make,
that sound.

I breathed 
a sigh of relief,
or would,
if I could.
If I could feel 
air in my
lungs,
instead of water
rushing 
into 
them.

You see,
the stage,
it had a habit
of running late,
of 
being predictable,
only 
in it's ability 
to 
piss me off.

It ran fast,
& it ran slow,
only enough so 
my plans
were only that.
Plans,
& not what 
I could rely 
on. 

And yes,
I DO see the 
irony
here.
The subtle 
transference,
deflecting.
Pot calling the 
kettle 
black,
type of
defining someone else,
by 
my own 
shortcomings,
kind of
thing.

But,
I thought I knew
better,
didn't I.
That I could 
be close,
be close enough.
So
that I could 
stop it.
Stop 
the 
only thing
that 
COULD
happen,
that night.

Yes,
I know.
I've heard it all
before this.
The explanations.
The logical 
reasons.

That faith,
predictions,
premonitions.
They don't work,
they don't exist. 
They. Are. Not.
Real. 

Fine.
Then tell me why,
then.
Tell me why,
I saw him there
that night.
Why 
the winds blow 
in that direction,
why 
I see him,
outside my balcony
windows,
on the dirt 
street 
below. 

Why I know,
he will
always
be 
there.

I could tell you
why. 

But that's 
another story,
isn't it.

But,
like Sara used 
to tell me,
the beginning,
or the
end,
all depends
on,
who's telling
the story...


Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Who I Wanted To Be--Hope & Survivors Series--Fire & Ice Series

The sun shines on 
you.
The only piece
of reality
I can still
hold on to.

The caves,
that once hid
your sight 
so well 
from me,
now 
closes in,
& enfolds me,
like
a blanket.
Soft,
warm,
safe.

This Darkness,
I used to crave so,
has left me,
I'm afraid.
It's all I've known,
what will I 
live for
now.

The Light,
they lied about that,
too,
didn't they,
the way it lies
in front of me
now.
It seemed so 
real,
back then,
the Possibilities.
The Truth.

It's not what they 
said it would 
be,
you know.
The Place,
between where I know,
& where they 
say,
I should be.

That......
perfect place,
between 
now & then.
Between......
here & 
there,
between 
where I feel safe,
& where I should feel at
home.
But I don't belong there.

Or,
I think I don't,
or 
I never did before.
Now,
I don't know for sure.
Not anymore.
If I've become......
finally.....
settled..........
or just....
tired,
worn down.
Edges smoothed out.
Creases washed 
away.

But does that make me
what you wanted,
or 
did it just make 
me
something I never wanted
to be.

Have I pleased myself,
or you.

Have I forgiven 
what I was,
or 
have I just 
let myself
forget.

What will I do,
when I don't know
what I've 
become.
I don't know 
anymore.
But,
I think I know
what I was.
What I am now.
And,
hopefully,
what I will become
someday,
will be someone
I can say
is who I wanted to
be,
too. 

Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Chasing You--AZ Rains Series--Angels, Guardians, & Soul Mates Series

The soft sounds,
of 
his breath,
on 
mine.

The picture,
I kept 
of 
you.
I look at
it,
still.

I wait,
each night,
&
talk 
quietly
to myself.
Because I know,
that,
if I don't
do 
something,
to keep
my 
mind sane,
I may
never know,
if it's
really 
you,
or 
me.

I walk,
down these stairs,
echos
on the floor boards,
dripping
down the walls,
they 
feel as real,
as you do,
in my 
arms.

And so,
I must,
once 
again,
realize I may
never 
know.
What part of 
me,
reaches
our for you,
to tame 
the thirst 
I see
in you.
Or,
if it's just 
me,
my cluttered mind,
seeking solace,
in a task
I can understand,
the game
of 
chasing
you.