Understanding Why--Who I See When I Write On My Blog

There's been an amazing response to my work here--& I do hesitate to use what feels like a professionals term like "My Work".

It feels like things other ppl do--Or what a person might put together if they thought it thru.

Frankly--I don't see myself this way.

I sort of drift thru life,with my little head lifted to the sky,looking at the breeze & colors as they drift by. And in my head I'm thinking about how it feels to me.I always have.

I've been able to share it a little here and there along the way.Always hopeing that someone will get something good from it,from what I say or maybe just how I saw it--Or maybe just feel some relief that they're not alone.

I know there's some ppl who won't get what I do--Or care. Or don't like me in some personal way.

My honest answer to them? To hurtful Negitive Energy sent my way by a Universe that can chew u up one day--& caress you the next??

Screw it.

You know why?

Because life is terrifyingly simple.

It's too short to care & too long to forget.

I'm causious by nature. I'm the Mama Bear to all who need me--But I would sacrifice all I know for 1 or 2 ppl in my life--With out apology or regret.

I never saw living past 30--Here I am 41.

The amazing beauty I've been allowed to possess in this lifetime--I could have never earned & didn't accept for a long time.

I know now I didn't have to-- I just keep paying it forward every day.

I've seen incredible grace--Under the shittiest raw deals--Handed to the most incredible ppl I will know--
And I stand witness to souls that I still feel I will never come close to being as good as.

But I've had the honor to guard them--& hopefully guide them some too.

In my poems--You see me.

The ppl I see. The way I see them.

The warriors--That's who these ppl are--In every sense.And some do actually wear uniforms--Or did.

The Dragons--Are me.Black wings.Wing spikes. Standing guard from a far.

That's where I'll probably always be.

But I do come closer, more & more as time goes on. I am more comfortable with my wings & spikes & claws--& don't feel like they have to be a hinderance anymore.

It seems that even the wildest Dragons can be tamed.

And I find writing these things--Shareing our lives & stories of Hope & Survivors--with my hatchling & ancient one, & being able to share it all with you--Has helped me fly in a way I never imagined.

Knowing I might help someone else learn how to fly too.

Olive Drab Angel--T & That Guy From FYE(You Know Why)--BASED ON A TRUE REAL LIFE STORY-- #POW / #MIA / #KIA / #WelcomeHome / #NeverForgotten -- #Memorial Day -- #Warriors --What My Life Often Looks like When I'm Not On My Blog

That Sound.
In Flight.
That Deep
Gut Wrenching
Soul Rescuing
Sound.
I Know It
Like No Other.

Echos Of It
Deep Inside
That Place
In My Mind.
It Mixes With
The Smells
Of That Place.
The Way It Felt.
The Other Sounds
I Knew It Would
Eventually Mix With It Too.

But If You Asked Me
What I Remember
The Most.
What Really Stuck With Me.
What I Really Saw
What I Really Heard
When I Looked Up
Into The Endless
Sky Above Me.
If I Could Look At You
& Be Truthful With You.

I Would Show You
A Picture I Carry
In My Mind.

Of An Angel
Clothed In Olive Drab.
Covered In Armor
Of Steel.
Wielding A Weapon.
Deadly.

Carrying With Gentle Grace
Those Who Could Fight No More.
Those Who Would Fight
To Avenge A Warriors Sacrifice.

An Angel
I Still See Now In My Sleep.
I Still Hear In My Dreams.
Never To Be Feared.
Always To Be Loved.

So Please
I Ask You.
To The Ones Who Guided
My Angels Path To Me.
To The Ones Who Still
Dream Of Me.

I Ask You
To Remember Me
In My Angels Embrace.
To Know What I Saw.
What I Know Was
& Will Always Be.

Our Angels Come To Us
In Many Forms.
Mine Took Shape Of
A Chopper.

Whispering In The Distance
I'm Bringing You Home.


Based on the stories I grew up hearing--& The one told to me, in broken words, covered in shame, while I was working in a tiny store, in small town,
when I was 27, about 15 yrs ago.

The Stories I heard, growing up,were glittered with awe. They were proud, respectful, reverent almost--That's how I knew them--That's who I saw.

When I met this man yrs later, with his own son next to him--I saw pain, sadness, regret....fear....that he'd done the wrong thing, that they would never forgive him.

I don't know why it works out that way for me--That I meet these ppl, that I become this....conduit....for these Moments.

But I was there--& It was meant to be, I suppose.

I looked at him, & we talked, in my line--Me behind a tiny cashier stand, music blaring, & all I could hear--Was his shame, & the Choppers he must still hear at night, in his dreams.

We talked some more--& It took me a time to realize, to compute that look--That he was one of the Ones--That had been a pilot--Or even a door gunner, I suppose--Because I already knew what one of those looked like.

I knew then--It--The Stories I knew....That he didn't know them....That no one told him....That he just didn't know....That he couldn't imagine not being that monster he only knew.

I don't remember the exact words anymore--Even tho I remembered them all for a long time.....But I remember the fogginess in his eyes--The reluctant eye contact--The refusal to see himself any other way.....

& I knew this was a Fate Moment--That changes you--Because you're about to change them....

& Told him the Stories I know.....

What the Guys saw....What they called him....What they always knew.....

That he was their Guide--Their Guardian....Their Savior.....

That they never remembered being left there.....

They only remembered their Angel approaching....Tearing through the sky.....
That it was almost over, at least for a little while.

Those are Moments that time stops--Just long enough--To witness a another human being change, and become something new.

I got to watch as another Creature I share this shit planet with--Be given a second chance....& Take with them a lighter load....Leaving room for a future, & not just a past.

I'm grateful for that....

& All our Angels
Who
Bring
Us
Home.

If you're still out there.....Thank you.....

& Welcome
Home.

SEPT. 2014
PATRIOTS DAY
POW/MIA DAY

AROUND THE SAME TIME
AS I WROTE
THE POEM/SHORT STORY

BOTH ARE HAND DRAWN--FREE HAND
BOTH FROM MY MEMORIES
&
FROM THE WAY I IMAGINE
THEY WOULD
BE

FOR THE WARRIORS
WHO MADE IT HOME
IN ONE WAY
OR ANOTHER.....

WRAPPED IN THE ARMS
OF THEIR
OLIVE DRAB
ANGELS....

WELCOME HOME.

Shimmy & Howl--Based On "Twist & Shout"--#Anipals

Well, shake it up, Fur Baby, now

Shimmy & howl

C'mon, c'mon, c'ome, Fur Baby, now

Come on & work that GlowCollar on out.

Well, work it on out, honey

You know you shimmy so good

You know you got me shimmying, now

Like I knew you would.

Well, shake it up, Fur Baby, now

Shimmy & howl

C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, Fur Baby, now

Come on & work that GlowCollar on out.

You know you shimmy little Pal

You know you shimmy so fine

Come on & shimmy the whole Pawty with me, now

And let me know that you're mine.

Well, shake it up, Fur Baby, now

Shimmy & shout

C'mon, c'mon, c'mon,Fur Baby, now

Come on & work that GlowCollar on out.

You know you shimmy little Pal

You know you shimmy so fine

Come on & shimmy the whole Pawty with me, now

And let me know that you're mine.

Well, shake it, shake it, shake it, Fur Baby, now

Well, shake it, shake it,  shake it, Fur Baby, now

Well, shake it, shake it, shake it, Fur Baby, now.

Fake Rawhide Chew Toys--Based On "Rawhide"--#Anipals

Rollin Rollin Rollin

Fake Rawhide Chew Toys!

Rollin Rollin Rollin

Though I'd rather be strollin

Keep that mailman rollin

Fake Rawhide Chew Toys.

Rain & winds & weather

This leash that feels like a tether

Wishing my squeaky was by my side.

All the things I'm missin

Good treats,head rubs, & Kittens

Are waiting at the end of his ride.

Move em on

(Head em up!)

Fake Rawhide Chew Toys!

Keep movin,movin,movin
Though that mailman's disapprovin
Keep that mailman movin
Fake Rawhide Chew Toys!

Don't try to understand em
Just growl, chase, & mark your territory around em
Soon we'll be livin high & yard wide.

My hearts calculatin
My squeaky will be waitin
Be waiting at the end of his ride.

Move em on
(Head em up!)

Cut em out
(Ride em in!)

Bark!(Leash crack)

Move em on
(Head em up!)

Cut em out
(Ride em in!)

Rollin Rollin Rollin

Bark!(Leash crack)

Fake Rawhide Chew Toys!!

When You Walk Away--T(You Know Why)--#POWMIA/#KIA/#WelcomeHome/#NeverForgotten--Hope&Survivors Series

A Shadow I carry in my Heart.

A Former Self, You & I.

What we 'Used To Be'.

Before You.

When I was Just Me.

But that can't be undone.

What we are now 

Is what we may Always Be.

Something New, I suppose.

Not Less,though.

Not anymore.
That's what we say.
What I know is meant for You & I.
A New Life, a Reason.
A New Direction.
Who Walks Point,who Rests,
& lets The Other take the Lead.
That may change.
But I already know,
that You & I can face anything.
And I know now,
That I 'm no longer afraid.

Great Hair Balls Of Fur --Based On Great Balls Of Fire--#Anipals

You shake your bell and you rattle my brain

Too much nip now zooms like a train.

You broke my blinds, oh what a bind

Goodness gracious great hair balls of fur.

I used to love all my perfect decor 

You look at me like oh what a bore.

I change your litter, I need a Cat sitter

Goodness gracious great hair balls of fur.

You groomed me Kitty,it feels comb-y
When I hold you Kitty, this house feels so home-y
Your hair's so fine, I can't tell which is mine
Mine, mine,mine.

You use your nails, I bandage my thumb
You make make me nervous but playing sure is fun
Come on your litter's stinky, great now you've scratched my pinky
Goodness gracious great hair balls of fur.

Well you groomed me Kitty, it feels comb-y
When I hold you Kitty, this house feels so home- y
You hair's so fine, I can't tell which is mine
Mine, mine, mine.

You use your nails,I bandage my thumb
You make me nervous but playing sure is fun
Come on your litter's stinky, great now you've scratched my pinky
Goodness gracious great hair balls of fur.

Black Magic Kitty--Based On Black Magic Woman--#Anipals--#Panfurs

Got a black magic Kitty

Got a black magic Kitty.

I got a black magic Kitty

Got me so blind I can't see

That he's a black magic Kitty

He's trin to make a Panfur fan out of me.

Raise your back fur at me baby

Raise your back fur at me baby.

Yes,don't raise your back fur at me baby

Stop messin around with your tricks

Don't raise your back fur at me baby

You just might pick up my pipe cleaner sticks.

Got your nip potion spell on me baby

Got your nip potion spell on me baby.

Yes,you got your nip potion spell on me baby

Turnin my house into a Kitty condo

I need a lint roller so bad-magic Kitty

But I can't let you go.

Love Is Simple--Equal Love--Equal Marrage--Hope&Survivors Series

Love Is Simple.

It's People 

That Make It So

Complicated.

Life Is Hard.

It's People 

Who Don't Want To

Understand.

Time Is Short.

It's People 

Who Don't Make The Effort To

Care.

Love.

It's Simple.

Be Happy.

Be Kind.

Be There.

Be Grateful.

What They Prayed For--R & G-- Special Needs/Hope&Survivors/#OTRB/#Anipals

You Never Know 

Why You're Sent

To Do 

What You Do.

Do It 

With Love.

With Graditude.

Understanding

That You 

Might Be

The Angel

SomeOne's Been 

Praying For

All Along.

SomeBody's Angels--Special Needs/Hope&Survivors Series--R&G--#Anipals

When You See 

That Mom

Frazzled

Worn.

Tired.

When You See

That Kid

Loud

Screaming

Confused.

Dont Stare.

Plz 

Don't Judge.

When You Wonder

Why Doesn't 

That Mom 

Do Something.

When You Wonder

Why Does

That Kid 

Act That Way.

Remember

These
People
You See
These
People
You Wonder
About.
In Each Other's
Eyes
They're
SomeBody's Angels.

A Journey Through Hope&Survivors On My Blog

I think it's important to let you know--That there are certain themes that run through what I do.

One of those, & maybe the real foundation, is Hope & Survivors.

I learned this growing up--I learned it through my own trial & error--& I watched it being displayed in front of me, by the strongest person I'll ever know.

These experiences are my own--My perspective.But I also incorporate lessons & stories of others in many of these mini-stories I call Poems.

My hope has been to share something good--Through the bad--& remind ppl that Survival is possible.

Thanks for taking that Jouney with me.

Going With The Flow-The Changes On My Blog

I've discovered that over time,I seem to write about certain things--Sometimes subconsiously--Sometimes intentionally.

So,sinse I write what I know--It might help to label things in a way that tells you where my mind is,when I write something new.

You'll see changes now & then,where I label things.It's also to help me keep track of my own wondering thoughts.

The one thing I probably wont label as a series--Will be "R&G"--That's because this entire Blog is actually dedicated to R&G--The 2 ppl who I'm closest too--& the 2 ppl I sometimes have the hardest time telling them how I feel.

So this is for you.

Armor We Wear--#Dragons Series--Warriors Series--Hope&Survivors Series

Armor

We Wear Together.

This Fight can not 

Be done Alone.

My Shield 

Your Scales.

My Sword

Your Wing Spikes.

Sharpened in

Battle.

Dulled by

Disuse.
We Stand Together
An Odd Pair
You & I.
Small & Frail
Towering & Fearsome.
They back away
As They see You.
They Study Me
As They look past You to Me.
They Know We are One
You & I.
The Same.
Eternity is in
Our Eyes.
Of Walking Alone
Side By Side.

Born To Be Feral--Based On "Born To Be Wild"--R&G--#Anipals

Get your purr-er runnin

Head out on the driveway.

Lookin for adventure

And whatever comes our way.

Yeah Darlin go make it happen

Take the neighborhood in a furry embrace.

Nibble all of your nip at once

And explode into space.

I like smoke and lighting
Fur static thunder.
Zooming with the wind
And the feelin that I'm under.
Yeah Darlin go make it happen
Take the neighborhood in a furry embrace.
Nibble all of your nip at once
And explode into space.

Like a true natures Fur Child
We were born,born to be feral.
We can climb so high
I wanna learn to fly.

Born to be feral.
Born to be feral.

Middle Age Dirtbag--Based On "Teen Age Dirtbag"--R&G

His name is Kel

I had a dream about him

I've seen him at Taco Bell.

I've gotta go to the gym in half an hour

Oh how he rocks

In Mandles and tube socks.

But he doesn't know who I am

And he doesn't give a crap about me.

Cause I'm just a middle age dirtbag baby.
Yeah,I'm just a middle age dirtbag baby.
Listen Hendrix maybe with me.

His girlfriends a scank
And she wears way too much perfume to work.
And she'd start rumors behind my back
If she knew the truth.
She lives in my burg
And drives a cool Firebird.
But she doesn't know who I am
And she doesn't give a crap about me.

Cause I'm just a middle age dirtbag baby.
Yeah,I'm just middle age dirtbag baby.
Listen to Hendrix maybe with me.

Oh,yeah,dirtbag,no he doesn't know what he's missing.
Oh,yeah,dirtbag,no he doesn't know what he's missing.

Geeze,I feel like stuck on shower mold
It's the office party and I'm lonely.
Low and behold
He's walking over to me.
This must be joke
I start to choke
Dude I'm stoked.
How does he know who I am?
And why does he give a crap about me.

I've got two tickets to a Hendrix cover band baby.
Come with me Friday,don't say maybe.
I'm just a middle age dirtbag like you.

Oh,yeah,dirtbag,no he doesn't know what he's missing.
Oh,yeah,dirtbag,no,he doesn't know what he's missing.

In Between The Lines--Hope&Survivors/Writers&Musicians Series--#ScienceNerd

The Night.

Cold it Seems.

Dark

Empty .

Like Space

They say.

Alone.

But what 

You don't

Hear

Is something

I've always 

Known.

Emptiness

Is not 

Alone.

Quite

Is never

Still.

All Space

Is Filled.

Be it

In my 

Mind

Or anywhere

Else I might Be.

Spaces

In Between.

These are

Where the Real

Things Live.

Where the

Real Stories

Begin.

Sleep's Balm--Hope&Survivors Series

Stains 

that soon

Washed away.

Cleansed by

Love.

Her own 

Happiness 

Soon clear.

As Time

Soothed

The Wounds.

Sleep 

A balm.

Reappearance--Hope&Survivors Series

In Plain Sight

A person

Disappears.

Hope finds

Those that were

Lost to themselves.

Fate finds them & 

Love keeps them safe.

Decent--Wings Series--Guardians,Angels,&SoulMates

The Sky opened up

And revived Her.

Whole 

They said.

Perfect

Beautiful.

The Earth softened 

Cushioned Her.

Fall

They said.

Eternal

Inevitable.

He opened His Arms

And Held Her.

Safe 

He said.

Forever

His.

How Do I Love My #Anipals-Let Me Count The Ways

Anipals

Fun in every Form.

Plushies

Cartoons

Pets.

Staff

Humans

Pet Parents.

Each has something

That brightens my Day.

A kind Word

A Prayer.

A Pawty

To Shimmy to

To Raise Funds

&

Aweness.

Each new Friend

Each new Pal

Is a new Joy.

A new chance

To Learn

To Grow.

Thank You.

Stages Of You--Fate Series--Angels,Guardians,&SoulMates

Truth.

On your Lips.

In your Words.

In your Touch.

Faith.

On my Mind.

In my Thoughts.

In my Heart.

Proof.

On my Skin.

In my Trebleing.

In my Acceptance.

Of You.

More--Wings/Roses/AZ Rains Series--Angels,Guardians,&SoulMates

Black hair

Thin build

Long fingers.

Head tilts

Eyes follow me.

Breath close

Voice slow

Touch inevitable.

What I Give--#Dragons Series--Warriors Series--#ToughPals--R&G

Sharp teeth

Claws

1000 Yard Stare.

These you see

You know they're me.

Quiet moments

A baby's soft cry

TV with You.

These you don't

Always see

But they are

Me too.

Which do I hide

More.

I don't know.

Which scares me

More.

Some days

The Bad

Some days 

The Good

Even more.

But there 

It is.

Claws

Gentle hands

And all.

Me.

It's All I Have

And I give it to You.

What You See--#Dragons Series--Warriors Series--#ToughPals--R&G

Sharp Wing Spikes

Claws

That frighten you.

Large black wings

Leathery

That hold you.

Teeth discolored

Bloody 

That protect you.
A Soul
Challenged 
That Loves You.
What you see
Illusions
Underneath is me.
Time takes You
Forever
Stay with me.
This Place
Eternity
Not so far.
Your face
Beautiful
Is all I need.